Marriage and family life have become for many painful and unfulfilling. In the last century the divorce rate rose over 700 %. In the U.S.A. over one million children each year are involved in divorce proceedings.

Some say the figures will fall. Why? Is it because people are getting back to the Bible? No it is because they are just no longer getting married.

I read a story about a gold prospector. They found his skeleton in the desert where he had died. Nearby they found his old mule, he had tied his mule to a post, and the mule remained there and died. When they took the saddle bags away from the carcass of the mule they discovered that they were packed, with what looked like gold, in fact it was only fool’s gold.

The old prospector had written a note, " I died rich ha ha I died rich!" Little did he know he had been living hard in a wilderness with an old mule for something worthless, he didn’t know the true value of what he had.

I wonder today do we appreciate the true value of our marriages, our homes and our families?

It is so obvious but it must be stated our marriages are under attack from Satan. As I approach this series, I have done so with considerable heart searching, firstly I know there are many, who have travelled much further along the road of family life than I have, and there may be things I haven’t even encountered yet. Some could say, "He doesn’t know what he is talking about."

I want to begin today where it all began, the first marriage. Adam and Eve had a good start, their marriage took place where there was no sin, and no divorces. They didn’t have any in-laws, Adam couldn’t compare Eve’s cooking with his mum’s and Eve couldn’t remind Adam of her former boyfriends.

However in this marriage we find God’s purpose for marriage, His divine design if you like.

Why are marriages seen so often, in stead of happy and blessed unions between two lovers, more like battlefields?

• Has there been a time when things have been worse instead of better and you would have loved to walk away?

• Has there been times when they have been poorer rather than richer and the temptation was there?

• Has there been sickness rather than health and it has been very difficult?

• Instead of loving and cherishing, there has been hating and bickering.

Let us firstly see that marriage is scriptural.

Before sin, before the giving of the law, we have marriage it is a creation ordinance, this type of relationship couldn’t have come through evolution, this was God’s divine way.

This was God’s plan from the beginning, marriage is God’s way.

Any attack on marriage is an attack on God and his plan for mankind.

God looked upon Adam and knew he would feel alone he needed a companion, not every one has to be married, sometimes it is God’s will for you to be single. But for most, marriage is God’s will.

Husband and wife sharing their life together, this is God’s way.

Adam as an intelligent being could name all these animals, but what would Adam notice?

He would see that all of the animals had a mate, but none of them were suitable for him, animal rights people try and equate animals with humans that is unscriptural and untrue.

Genesis 2:20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.

There was not found a help meet for him.

God made a helpmeet for Adam, the attraction between a man and a woman are natural not sinful, God recognised man’s need.

Marriage acts as a control and the natural sexual desires can be met within a marriage, and only within a marriage.

1 Cor. 7 teaches that every thing else is fornication, young people take note, sex outside of marriage is sin.

Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

There should be the leaving then the cleaving, there should be that marriage ceremony, a legally recognised marriage, any other sexual relationship is sin.

When man and woman join in marriage they become one flesh and they compliment each other, men and woman are the same in one sense.

Men and woman equal but they are different:

Man is the provider, woman the helper.

The husband is the protector, the wife the nurturer.

Men go by the head, woman by the heart.

Woman are sensitive, men usually insensitive.

We are different but we compliment each other, God has instituted marriage, beautiful counterparts.

Society would try and blur the distinctions.

Behind every good man is a good woman is a gross understatement, there is part of a man missing without a wife, Adam without Eve is like a violin without a bow, she was to complete him not compete with him

Genesis 2:23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

To separate bone from bone, flesh from flesh is very painful marriage is a unique and lasting bond between a man and a woman.

Malachi asks a very arresting question, why did God only make one woman for Adam?

Malachi 2:15 And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.

God’s intention was that each man should be a one-woman man, when man and woman become one flesh that is God’s way, polygamy was never God’s way just look at its examples and consequences in the Old Testament.

Genesis 1:28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.

This is God’s plan for continuing the human race. Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve, homosexual relationships are evil, sinful and of no benefit to society.

Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

There should be the leaving.

A man should leave his parents in order to establish his own family, when the dad is asked, "Who giveth this woman to be married to this man?" The bride is given away to become part of the new relationship.

This can be painful for the parents, but the couple should meet the problems together as they face them, it can be good to have parents ready to help but interference is rarely helpful.

Something else about leaving, it means to place every other relationship at a lower priority than the marriage relationship, except your relationship with the Lord.

A husband or wife, should be more than just a spouse, they should be best friends.

Business, career, hobby, friends, sports even church work, my first responsibility is to my wife, that’s what leaving means. How often we want to get married and try and keep our former lifestyles. I was reading where one third of married couples of childbearing age are now sterile to avoid having any children at all, they don’t want kids to cramp there lifestyle.

Not only leaving but then cleaving.

In the Greek of the New Testament the word cleave means, to be glued together, to adhere. Cleaving begins with marriage and continues through the lifetime of the couple.

They should be so stuck together that to separate would cause untold pain.

A marriage is worth whatever effort it takes to save it, this modern approach of, well we will try it for a while and if it doesn’t work we will find a new one, is unbiblical and destroys the sacredness of marriage.

In marriage there is a response, a decision.

There is a response and responsibility.

Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

We have noticed that marriage is scriptural, secondly let us see marriage and Satan.

Because it is scriptural it will be under attack from Satan.

Adam and Eve had the perfect marriage, it was made in heaven.

Adam was a handsome husband, she was a beautiful bride and they lived in a perfect place but the slithering serpent attacked.

He attacked God’s order by speaking to the Woman.

Genesis 3:1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?

It is interesting that the fall affected many areas that touch our marriages.

• Child bearing.

Genesis 3:16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

• Submission.

Genesis 3:16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

• Earning a living.

Genesis 3:17-19 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; [18] Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; [19] In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.

• Death.

Follow Satan’s destructive path through Genesis and see his attacks on marriage and what it protects.

• Polygamy.

Genesis 4:19 And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the one was Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.

• Evil sexual thoughts and words.

Genesis 9:22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.

• Adultery.

Genesis 16:1-2 Now Sarai Abram's wife bare him no children: and she had an handmaid, an Egyptian, whose name was Hagar. [2] And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the Lord hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai.

• Homosexuality.

Genesis 19:5 And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where are the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.

• Incest.

Genesis 38:13-14 And it was told Tamar, saying, Behold thy father in law goeth up to Timnath to shear his sheep. [14] And she put her widow's garments off from her, and covered her with a vail, and wrapped herself, and sat in an open place, which is by the way to Timnath; for she saw that Shelah was grown, and she was not given unto him to wife.

• Seduction.

Genesis 39:7 And it came to pass after these things, that his master's wife cast her eyes upon Joseph; and she said, Lie with me.

First of all society should be influenced by marriage but we have to say that society has influence the thinking on marriage.

Through T.V. Soaps, magazines and famous people flaunting their promiscuous lifestyles, marriage has been dealt many many blows.

Only where the marriage bond is held up as God’s ideal, will we have a strong society.

If the family is not preserved all society crumbles.

God’s way is clear.

As husband and wife come together within that marriage bond children will grow up being taught the things of God, they in turn will teach their children and society will grow up basing there behaviour and beliefs on God’s word. That as Queen Victoria once said was the secret of England’s greatness.

Without the family unit, that which we have mentioned under the heading Satan will become more and more rife while society crumbles.

Let me say this revival of family values must begin with God’s people. I don’t think it’s too much to say that the peace and well being of a nation depends on purity in the home.

We have been considering Adam and Eve, behind this biblical account is some wonderful truth for you.

While Adam was in a deep sleep, God did a wonderful work.

When Jesus Christ went into that sleep of death, God did a work that had to be done.

Genesis 2:22 And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

God built or made, this reminds us of what the Lord is doing now.

Matthew 16:18 And I say also unto thee, That thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.

That is what is happening today, because of Christ’s death and resurrection, God is building his church, calling sinners to repent, have you repented yet?

There is a warning here, when God had completed building Eve, HE then brought her to Adam.

One day the church will be complete and Jesus will come to receive his bride, will you be part of the bride? Or will you be left behind?

Romans 7:4 Wherefore, my brethren, ye also are become dead to the law by the body of Christ; that ye should be married to another, even to him who is raised from the dead, that we should bring forth fruit unto God.

Whatever your martial status, you need first and foremost to be married to Christ.

Simply we have considered this first marriage.

Columnist Mike Royko of the Chicago Tribune wrote this about marriage licenses, he said they should carry a health warning, "Use this at your own peril." The census statistics bureau say that using this licence could be dangerous to your future, mental, physical and financial health and could make you miserable for the rest of your life, if you live that long. It could lead to arguing, yelling, screaming, boxing, sulking, getting the silent treatment and a bunch of kids that are goofed up and make you feel guilty.

Whilst this could be true, let’s be positive, marriage can be very special.

Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

The word honourable was use of a man who had earned a reputation.

The word is also used by Peter.

1 Peter 1:19 But with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot:

2 Peter 1:4 Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

Precious is the same word.

Marriage should be held, as reputable and precious, marriage should be highly esteemed.

Matthew 19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?

John 2:1-2 And the third day there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there: [2] And both Jesus was called, and his disciples, to the marriage.

God the Holy Spirit endorses it, he inspired Paul to write.

Ephes. 5:31-32 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. [32] This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

How special is marriage to you?

The ideal marriage is not give and take, it is give and give.